In Memoriam: Oladipo Onipede, Jr.

Our Forever Brother

My brother made his transition out of this life on Tuesday, January 9th, 2024. The next day, I made this (edited) social media post on behalf of the Onipede family to notify others of this great loss.

At home, we called him “Junior,” as he shared the same name as our father. I called him “Bata Goon” for “Brother Junior” since I was the last child, and wanted so badly to speak, call his name, and get his attention. Later, his closest friends and high schoolmates called him “Dipo.” His kids called him “Baba” and “Bobs.” Unabashedly, he was our mother’s favorite!

“Ola” means "glory/blessing/intangible wealth” and “Dipo” means “increase, multiply or become excessive.” The “glory/blessing/intangible wealth” of my older sister being added to the family was further increased by the birth of my brother, the second child.

Oh my, that is the truth!!!

Enjoy the video montage.

Tribute

In May 2023, Dipo was diagnosed with cancer of the esophagus/stomach, but the timing of his transition was unexpected.

I had the privilege of spending a week with him over New Year’s just before his death along with his children and wife. My sister, Peri, also spent time with him recently.

My time with him a mere week before he died was filled with love, gentleness, laughter, intimate knowing looks, stories of our parents, our childhood, and his deep reflections on his illness and death although we did not think it would be this soon.

I could put on my pastoral care hat and listen deeply to a brilliant, thoughtful man whom I love so dearly. And he opened up his mind and heart to his baby sister.

These things I know because he told me himself:
- He had no regrets.
- He had done everything he wanted to do with his life.
- He was shocked by his diagnosis.
- He did not want to suffer in pain.
- He was not afraid of death.
- He did not understand the point of life.

Today, I am personally stunned by God’s mercy and grace that I got to spend time with him with the intimacy of the cloud of illness and death hovering over him, that I was able to receive him talking about death, with complete acceptance, and that he did not suffer, at least not for long at all.

He died with dignity and peace peace, and he expressed a sense of equanimity.

We thought we had a few more months with him, and of course, I prayed for a miracle that his flesh would live and not die. And, I got a different miracle - being able to be with him for a whole week before he died, and for him not suffering. I have such a deep abiding Peace in both my heart and mind.

He expressed his love for his wife, children, and sisters with deep commitment and affection. However, recently, added to these loving priorities in his life, he took on Obi, his pet Akita. (I personally feel my brother was cheating on me with Obi, but OK. Fine.) He also had a Labrador, Bidik.

- He was proud to be an Onipede.
- He was proud to be a Nigerian.
- He was proud to be an Old Boy of King’s College, Lagos, Nigeria where he was known as “DADDY!” And sometimes, “Papa, the Bull!”
- He was devoted to his wife, Selin, and was deeply proud of his children, Yeshim and Kerem.

He was significantly taller than me and, whenever he saw me, he would put his hand on my head, rock it back and forth, and say with Yoruba emphasis, “Iyabo!” And I would glow at his joy at seeing me and I felt the love of an adoring and protective older brother. When he kissed my forehead, I knew that I was a well-loved human. And when he called me, “Baby Girl,” or “Baby Sister,” I knew I had a special place in his heart. I always felt good around him.

He was beloved as Associate Director of Academics at the School of Engineering, Penn State, Erie, The Behrend College. He was a fabulous and gifted teacher and could teach me math when I was younger. Let’s say it was not easy.

Join me in celebrating the life of this absolutely remarkable man: Brother, husband, father, cousin, teacher, and friend to many. Grab a beer, Kentucky bourbon beer, a Sam Adams, or Blue Moon. And if you know what it is, treat yourself to his favorite meal ever: ewedu, amala, and ox tails! And when you can, watch a Chelsea soccer match and know that he is right there cheering with you. Enjoy and toast him. He would have loved that.

You are now at rest, my love. Thank you for being the best big brother a girl could ever have. You are the best!!! And, thank you for being the best younger brother to Peri.

Peri and I love you so much, Baba. Your physical absence hurts, but you hurt no more. Thank you for all the beautiful and loving memories you left us with.

He is survived by his loving wife of 30 years, Selin; his daughter, Yeshim Olaperi; his son, Kerem Olatunde; his sisters, Olaperi Onipede and Iyabo Onipede; his brother-in-law and sister-in-law, Ali and Ozlem; his nephew, Emre; and his niece, Ege.

Sun re O!
Baba rere.


Please treat yourself to his professional bio here: https://drive.google.com/file/d/16FIdF4murbIzGW3-5K-3JzDc6OL90L-x/view?usp=sharing

Enjoy reading a speech he gave at a graduation for his students in 2022 to get a feel for his own voice.
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1Gj4gVhgU5DdDvk6he3bbLBpQ6xeuKTfj/view?usp=sharing