On Beauty-Full-Ness

What happened?

First Things First!

 Sooooo, that world cup final game - I was conflicted. There is something in me that wanted to root for France - Beautiful Black Young Men, and especially, 19-year-old Kylian Mbappé, nicknamed “the arrow” for his speed as he runs at 23 mph!!!!!  And his parents are from Cameroon and Algeria!!! Yet, France's history of colonization and how they do not want to acknowledge their Black players as Black - just "French," - is icky for me. Sigh! But those Black men!!!

But then... I fell in love with 35-year-old Leo Messi of Argentina. He had to leave his working-class community in Argentina at age 13 to receive growth hormone treatments in Spain as, according to almighty Google, he had growth hormone deficiency dwarfism. Dwarfism, y’all. Also, this is probably his last world cup because of his age. He has heart and he just sucked me in! I love him. And he is considered the "Maradona" of our time. Glorious. But Argentina whitewashed their country, wiping out Black and Indigenous folks and it is the whitest nation South America. And they hid Nazis after World War II. Icky yuck, yuck, yuckity yuck!!!

I settle on the premise that it is not about the country but the heart of the players. It was an incredible game, and I am so glad I got to watch it with my quarter baked understanding of the game! I love Messi's story though so I am leaning that way right now knowing I have a lot of time, God willing that there are no injuries or anything like that, to be a fan of Mbappé, the Arrow in many more World Cups!!!

Ok, Back to Reality

I looked up and it is Christmas this week!!! What happened????

I still feel, in body and mind, that I just made it past September!!!

Know that I continue to write although it is not publishable here on Substack. However, I have not sent anything out in a while as I have been busy doing other things that are also important. That is why I have not been as focused on publishing here, which is what I want, right? You should see how many incomplete pieces of writing I have on my desktop!!! I hope they are all saved!

I am not exactly happy with myself about that, because I realize that I think perfection is better than "done." Nope. It does not work that way, Iyabo. Done is better than perfect, young lady.

O, excuse me. I was just having a conversation with myself....

Back to you.

This was an incredibly busy Fall for me, and my community work took center stage in my life. As you know, I wear two hats: I work part time with Compassionate Atlanta, the awesomest place ever! And I do my own consulting on racial justice. Those two things have kept me busy. Here are some tidbits:

1. My role as Co-Director of Compassionate Atlanta is the best "job" I have ever had! It is grant writing season and we have been quantifying all our successes to ask grantors to continue to support our amazing work. I am grateful for this incredible opportunity. And just this week, we saw the payoff with a massive 3-year grant! (Phew! Job Security! 🙃 Ha!).

2. I went up North and visited with my sister in October and that was so good. We love to be together. I am so grateful that she is not just my sister but my friend. She makes my eyes light up with joy. So does my brother and his kids, but I do not see them as much. While I was up there, my niece gave me the flu even though I had my flu shot. When I got back, I slugged around for quite a few days. It just took so long to get back on my feet and get in the groove again!!! Then my sister turned around and came to be with me for Thanksgiving. I love that gal!

3. While I was up North, I went on a 6-day Teacher Training Retreat for The Gateless Method. OMG. OMG. OMG. I found my tribe!!! It was wonderful. It is an amazing process. I did a 9-month Gateless program last year that boosted my writing - a lot. And it led me begin this Substack missive. The house we stayed in was directly across the street on the Long Island Sound but in the Connecticut side, and my room was on the 2nd floor. I opened my windows at night and slept to the sound of the waves. 15 of us gathered and wrote and found places within our beings where our words flowed from. It was sublime!!! I am so deeply grateful I had this experience.

Scene from my window. Can I go back please?

That Bucket List

Probably the only earnest thing on my bucket list is to spend three months in a cottage on a peaceful beach somewhere on the planet writing, taking daily walks, meditating, remembering, and pouring my heart out on paper. Not during hurricane season. This is my only fantasy in life!!!

O, yeah, and visit Hawaii with my sister.

Anddddd….. Visit the Almafi Coast of Italy - but maybe this time with a love interest? Ha! They say it is romantic. 🥰

I digress.

The writing retreat was 6 days of my primary fantasy, so I am working my way to 3 months!!!!

If you are a writer, you want the Gateless Academy 9-month online program in your life. I am going through it again this year and it is better than ever. Suzanne Kingsbury is a force to be reckoned with. We all have our work to do, and she has done, and is doing, so much of it and it shows in the product that she is putting out in the world. In short, her work liberates, and it expanded even my own understanding of inclusion.

Back To Us

As my Substack community, you will be hearing more from me. I have been working on that memoir that is showing how I had to unlearn colonization and whiteness to find more of me and to be able to be more in community. The pieces are too long to put in Substack but I have been writing and that is what I asked you to do - to support my writing by subscribing. So, thank you for being here.

My hope, as we all careen to the end of the year, is that I will see my own beauty-full-ness, for others to see their own beauty-full-ness, so that even more of the world can see theirs. I do know that one's awareness of their own beauty-full-ness reduces harm in the world, allows for us to be in diverse spaces, and makes sure all are included.

May we all experience beauty-full-ness as we celebrate the holidays, solstice and end-of-year-ness. And if we do not turn towards these special days for some, may we find beauty and awe in the ordinary.

Please be well and be safe. I am deeply grateful for you in my life!